today is my daughter's birthday-- which means that fourteen years ago i became a mother.

my daughter was born on her due date, but she did not come into this world easily-- we were both at serious risk during her delivery and there is a note of trauma in my memories of it--but we came through with a bond and an ease with each other that people remark on often.  she is her own person-- deep, thoughtful, cautious in ways i have never been.   she is smart, creative, funny, and incredibly beautiful and i love watching and being part of her growing into adulthood.  i am intensely proud of that girl.

motherhood is among life's most difficult roles.  for many it is overwhelming, difficult, challenging, AND joyful, fun, and filled with lots and lots of love.  for me it has been all those things-- but also  centering, calming, and deeply satisfying.  i first felt i truly knew who i was on the morning that my oldest daughter was born.  she and her sister teach me, daily, more about myself than anything else i do.  and they push me every day to be better than i yet know that i can be.   we have our struggles, individually and with each other, but there is nothing i do that is more important to me, more fun-- more deeply  enjoyable-- than my mothering of my daughters.

i feel unbelievably lucky.

happy birthday cecelia!  (who is six in this photo).



ariana. said...

Happy Birthday Cecelia! You were sweet and lovely and special when I met you in third grade and you still are! I hope you have a wonderful day celebrating this day of yours! Love, a.

shopgirl said...

thanks, ari!

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